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obamallamatime:

Hello, Police? I accidentally stepped on my cats foot and need to be arrested

My favorite Disney princess is Elizabeth Swann because rather than becoming a princess, she was like “nah, fuck that” and became a king instead.

hangthecode:

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arcticmonkies:

Do my dark undereye circles and unwashed hair turn you on

captainamuricasass:

I wanna be

where the people are

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iamnotcleveratall:

forgeticus!

iamnotcleveratall:

forgeticus!

"Yeah I’m sorry, I can’t afford a Ferrari,
But that don’t mean I can’t get you there.
I guess he’s an Xbox and I’m more Atari,
But the way you play your game ain’t fair.
"

- Cee Lo Green

iilanawexler:

get to know meme | [4/5] favorite movies

Clerks II ➾ “You never go ass to mouth!”

thepondsaregone:

thorinoakenbutt:

castielandpie:

poryqon:

it bothers me that Kansas and Arkansas are not pronounced the same

I’m from the UK and I have been pronouncing Arkansas as Ar-Kansas my whole life

For all my non-american friends, Arkansas is pronounced ark-an-saw

WHAT

"You and I go hard at each other like we’re going to war.
You and I go rough, we keep throwing things and slamming the door.
You and I get so damn dysfunctional, we stopped keeping score.
You and I get sick, yeah, I know that we can’t do this no more.
"

- Maroon 5 (via lyricobsession)

lavenderharmony:

ejaculot:

when u see people having fun and you want to join but ur just like

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I relate to this so hard it’s upsetting me